I heart NYC & Toronto

Hey guys! (whoever is reading still haha...) I'm back! Wanted to blog so much but coz i didn't bring my lappy with me, i didnt. and definitely wont now that i'm back. 3 wks of adventure is hell lot to blog! just check out dan's blog at www.danielcaiintoronto.blogspot.com hahaa.. it has some stuff. oh well check my facebook for pictures too! which i will be uploading slowly but surely ;) Had SO much fun! gosh i wish i didnt have to come back... start work and study! ughhhhhhhhh maybe i shld have taken 1 yr off and just accompany dan in Toronto. i love tat place. it's so quaint and nice. alright tat's all for now. will tell u all my stories when i do get to meet u!! ask me out ok!! hehe

Dreaming of a white christmas...

i'll be flying this friday. mixed emotions. but i know it's gonna be awesome!! =) my head is hurting from all this stress... ugh...

Emptiness

Have been feeling rather empty recently. not sure why. it's like at the back of my mind, i miss dan... but i just wouldn't wanna think abt it lest it gets to me. sigh. sessions of checking out cute guys... talking abt them... and going out with a random guy who asked me out a couple of times kinda gave me this want for a guy to be ard. who wouldnt admit that it indeed feels good to be pursued? not like i'm being pursued now.. just that it would be nice to have someone ard. of coz i wish dan could be the one. but well, looks like it's gonna be me, and just me for a while. watching gossip girl and with cute nathan and all that romance and making out is not helping either. makes me wanna be with someone even more. gosh this makes me sound really desperate ya? maybe i shld stop laughing at desperate ppl. perhaps it's a human thing. perhaps i have never felt this coz i've always had someone when i needed one and even if i dont, i think i'm capable of getting one. which brings me to the point where once again, i prove that my boss can be such an ass when it comes to jokes. he knows no limits and often step on ppl's toes. and yes, my toes!

"so zandra... where are u going? oh... to visit ur bf... why dont u give him a surprise? like go earlier or sth? but hope it won't be you who will be surprised... catching him with another girl... what would you do? aiya perhaps u dont even need to think of extending your leave if that happens. you'll come back like 3 days later. what would you do?" -- boss

"haha if that happens, i'll just leave. and of coz i'll come back with a cuter guy!" -- my mouth

"wow he's away for 1 year... so how?... you mean you trust him? there's no such thing as trust. you're so naive... and yes we're so naive to even hire you!" -- boss

"WTF?" -- my head

you get what i mean? he's just a jerk to even say such a thing! i know he's kidding and all but i do think he needs to be more tactful. and yes i have been feeling sensitive nowadays not coz i dont trust him... just coz i feel so far away and thus insecure. that joke was really way overboard for me. ughhhhhhhhhhhh. and it was a DEPARTMENT meeting MIND YOU! like WTFFFFFFFFFFFF rarrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!!

Living the HIGH life

stood and walked in the sun for 5 straight hours today at the Barclays Singapore Open. half burnt now. like literally. half my face... wearing my shades and a visor explains it. I looked like a red & white faced monster now. my arms are burnt. and the worse is... ny neck has a v-shaore burnt!! all thanks to my polo tee!! now i look like daniel when he was in army!!! boohoohoo.. my batam tan went to a waste!

anyways, that's not the highlight of my little experience obviously. let's just say that i wanted a taste of living the high life... and i saw for myself the kind of ppl who attends or play golf.. and i really wanna learn golf now!! suffice to say that the number of cute and rich guys who were there alr motivated me. yes tat's so shallow of me... but watever! i've seen more cute and eligible guys than i have the past 4 years in uni!!! and the past 4 months at work!! sometimes it's just nice to live out that little fantasy... i was literally stalking this 2 caucasions... or rather, my parents and i... haha!! these 2 guys are sooooooooooooooooooo hot!! altho i suspect they're gays.. they're prob together from their mannerism...ekkks AND i also saw tonnes of good-built -good-looking MEN (i must stress this), driving their lambos,beemers,SLKs,lotus,lexus... like u name it, they have it... it's so tempting to just be a slut and make my sole aim in life to find a rich and handsome guy and be a taitai. but that will never happen. kinda. coz i never ever attract caucasions. i dont know why but i just dont. and i guess i dont have the heart of an SPG too. also most of those chinese eligible guys are prob taken. well, so am i. i can just sit and hope that one day my darling will like golf too.. have a good built...drive a flashy car... and still want me as his gf. or wife. haha! when will that day be?

but on a more serious note... golf is really for the upper class. it's the whole meetyourfriends-flauntyourskills-showoffyourgirl-drinklotsofbeer-walktoyoourflashycar event. but despite it being like that... these people really DO play golf and they know their stuff. and i think that's what makes them so forgivable even if you feel they lead a life of decadence. if they have what it takes, why shldn't they flaunt it. it's who they are. we're just being envious. ok i'm just being envious. i wanna have that kinda status one day. i wanna learn how to play golf.... not just because it's a sophisticated game, but through this experience i actually find it an exciting sport!! hard to believe ya? it has a lot to do with strategy as well as precision and accuracy. it's a perfect game for someone who seeks so much perfection like me =) that's something for me to decide on in the future...

oh well.. more on the game.. i actually DID concentrate on the game ok! guys were just during breaks. hahaa... Vijay Singh was soooooooooooooo close to a tie!! in fact i thought his game was way better and more exciting than the lead's! and my new idol now... Adam Scott! not only is he good-looking... and definitely skillful!! he's cool too hahaa... loves it when he does that golfer's pose.. and his pants couldnt have been cooler!! i know darling would love those pants if he saw it. 100%. i walked from the 7th hole to 18th... and mind u... before we even decide to stay at the 7th hole, we were walking all over the place coz we were clueless as to where the holes were located. yes... brainless us didnt check the MAP. hahaa... it's actually quite tiring watching golf live! it's alot of walking.... u get thirsty but try not to get so many drinks coz a CAN of 100plus cost us $2. ridiculous! then again..rem the ppl there are rich so they bought ALOT of drinks. sentosa just wanna make the kill at such events... anyways, altho i'm totally burnt and hot now... i enjoyed and am glad i went! it was an awesome experience getting to meet world famous ppl and have them smile back at u... =) alright.. back to work tmr... zzzzzzz

I'm Alive...

oh well this blog has been quiet for quite a while... somehow i always end up wanting to blog after speaking to R!! anyways... decided to blog coz i'm feeling really grossed out and scared after watching Pleasure Factory. Yes it's dumb and silly of me... the image of the old man still haunts me! =( honestly, the show suck! and it doesnt deserve any mention at all at the cannes festival. sigh! there's just too much left to the audience's imagination and stuff tat the audience can actually realistically do some imagination the director has to show it so explicitly. there's just not enough development of characters and re-creation of the feel and atmosphere of geylang. it felt like the whole show was just abt a few ppl wanting to or contemplating if they shld do it and ends up doing it. minimal speech was used in the film which explains why we were left baffled more than half the time. sigh! but i feel affected nevertheless... scene of the girl giving the old cheekopek man a blowjob still haunts me!! =( i hate the show!

anyways... finally got to speak to darling for a while this afternoon. told him how upset i was that he didnt mention me at all in his post! he mentioned his friends and even his family but not me. call me sensitive or watever u want... but he's so far away.. the least he could do to make me feel remembered is to mention me somewhere.. how unfair! anyway demanding me told him i would have to see me in there somewhere in his next post.. hahaa i enjoy torturing him! ;) i miss him... so much... can't wait for dec!! alright i shld really sleep... church, winter clothes trying and Barclays open tmr... i would need the energy... later!

Bored and Alone.

Feeling totally lazy to blog but still decided to do an update for whoever who still reads this. then again it's more of me needing some place to rant and bitch abt my seemingly perfect life. Anyways, have been feeling so in need of love recently, that it made me wonder if love relationships are really that important? i always say i can live without one... it's better... more care free blablabla... but now i'm not sure if that's the case. Either that or it's just some form of withdrawal symptoms since dan has been gone for almost 2 over months now. i just miss having someone to come back to after a long day at work... someone whom i know will never refuse to give me that much needed hug... someone who spurs me to strive for my dreams and aspirations everyday to keep my fighting spirit going strong... someone who i can love totally and not just superficially... someone who i can snuggle with and feel eternally happy and blissful. that person is just not here now. just for now. sigh!

I'm sure it's just me having withdrawal symptoms. if i didnt already have a bf, i wouldnt keep thinking that i am missing out on such things right? or would i?

***removed***

partying with some girls tonight. cheers to a guilt-free love life! =)

Busy Monday

removed part of my previous post... realise that it was really stupid and thrashy. hope no one read it yet haha...

anyways... had one hell of a monday! busy to the MAX. got off at 8pm for the first time doing real real work. not some stupid project tat's prob not gonna be appreciated. that said, i find myself wanting to turn everything at work into an opportunity for me to show that i'm better than the rest. i was just thinking to myself this morning on the bus... am i really tat competitive how rouen described me?? coz i dont think so... but nowadays it seems like i'm showing signs of competitiveness more obviously. but then again it cant be! i feel uncomfortable being obviously better. i always tend to give credit to others. yes... like just now... it was me who obviously did 90% of the powerpoint report... but yet i gave the guy the chance to email it out... obviously ppl will think he did it... why did i do such a thing? i have no idea... at that point, it just seems like i shouldnt have snatched his job (not that he really minds less work seriously). this was suppose to be his job but coz he didnt do his other job on time, this is being put on hold. and since i'm suppose to "help" him, i did everything. yes everything. but yet i gave him to chance to claim the credit. i regretted after... but wat's this?? am i mad? haha maybe i am... sigh! i hope this competitiveness in me wont overtake me. i wanna be liked. =)

alright really tired... till then... have a good week ahead!

Randomness

I actually had alot to blog about... but i kinda forgot what they are now that i have the time to... i will when i remember... =)

Anyways, had a tiring weekend! friday was fantastic tho. finally caught Ratatouille!! thanks mark for asking me out.. suppose to chill or bitch or watever with my twin but in the end she had training. but it's good coz she got her promotion!! at last! =) and my employment has been confirmed.. no more threats of lengthening my probation by evil joking bosses hahaa.. :) right, went for supper at newton hawker after that coz we didnt have dinner... too many ppl in town.. we actually caugh a fashion show by Etro in Paragon... quite cool altho not the best i guess.. oh pls it's spore! in fact i was trying to catch a glimpse of pierre png more than anyone else.. he just look soooooooooooo charming. goshh darling.. tat's the type of guy u shld get jealous abt. hahaa i was totally mesmerised... he looked SO good in his clean pressed shirt and cufflings holding a champagne glass. i wouldnt compare him with hollywood-celebrities-guy charming but he is for a sporean guy. it's not the fact tat he's a celebrity or he's handsome.. his look is unique.. but it's more of the kinda vibes he exudes... oh well... he's taken! haha but i dont wanna believe that there arent anymore good men out there. there are limited and few... but i think there are. it's whether we find them =)

Renewed Direction.

I actually took action and signed up for my CFA level 1 haha! u have no idea how excited i am! =) i really miss studying! or rather...i miss the challenge it brings... and i am definitely not getting any now with my current job. not that i have not been using my brains for it... it's just so logical and common sense. honestly, a kid can do it with practice. i simply love the complexity of finance altho i admit i really suck at it. haha. i do! but finally looking at something familiar again just excites me! i am gonna study REAL hard for it. i cant fail! if i didnt see wrongly, the passing rate is 40%. and it costs 990USD. boohoohoo... if i fail... sobz... less shopping again!

Spent the whole night waiting for darling to call. but yet again he didnt. in fact, i ended work earlier (abt 7.20pm haha) so that i can make it back home to wait. ok fine i had a bad day at work too so i wanted to come back. haha. but still!! ok see, at times like these i tell myself it's ok or it doesn't matter even if i dont get to talk to him... but wat are the long term consequences? can we really live independently from each other? or is it healthy? as it is.. i am already feeling more distant.. talking to him like i would a friend more than a bf! it's not intimate anymore. i refrain from saying certain things readily like i miss u... i love u.... is it because i'm afraid it'lll arouse sad emotions or have we simply grown cold? am i just painting a great picture for myself, when in actual fact it's the complete opposite? i tend to ponder more nowadays. i just wish he called me.

so just like tat... i'm calling it a night... will there be a follow-up email? sigh. i doubt it. it's time to sort things out. but for now... nitez...

I do miss u

I do miss dan alot after all. somehow i'll always shed a tear everytime he says goodbye. sometimes i wonder if i suppress my feelings too much. i mean, besides those couple of days after he left, i never thought much abt his disappearance anymore. i wake up each day with the independent-woman attitude. which i believe i am nevertheless. like i was explaining to a bunch of frens last night.. being able to live alone and being able to live life without him doesnt mean that i dont want him in my life. in fact, i think it's totally opposite. i want him so badly in my life but then i think it's good tat we are still able to live life away from each other. i think this is something not many couples can achieve. and much to my surprise, i'm surviving well.

this short time apart has actually helped me remember singlehood. and anusha's right. this time and space does help to sort out our individual lives better. i think it's also impt coz time apart does make me treasure what i have more and it becomes more apparent that it's him i want in my life more than anything else. darling i love u =) hugz

Mid-Autumn Festival

Helping out at the mid-autumn festival in church yesterday really exhausted me! stood for most of the afternoon and the weather was SO hot and humid. ekkkks.

Met this pretty nasty auntie in church. i dont mean to bitch but she was really irritating and bossy. i was the first to be given some task and later when she came along, K asked me to explain to her what we have to do. so i did. minutes later... i heard K saying... "Hey! u have done it wrongly... i said each person in the family gets one coupon..." and guess how Y replied... *finger POINTING at me* "Not my fault ah.. she tell me one!! she told me it's only yadayada..." RIGHT. that was just incident no. 1. & mind u, i didnt tell her just once but explained it like 2-3 times and SHE was obviously the BLUR one. humph.

As we were doing.. and more ppl came to help us... she started bossing ppl ard! or rather.. she kept yelling!! she treated those who were helping out like some thrash.. "eh! anymore or not ah? KW (oh this is an ADULT)! you got more there? pass it over la!!" then she just kept murmuring some grumbles to herself softly but loud enough for my sharp ears to hear. her husband is JUST THE SAME. ok fine, just slightly better. at least he doesnt rave and yell at others with no respect. and she did this a few times. after she blamed me i couldnt be bothered with her at all.

However... guess the night still ended off quite well. =) i think this young guy tried hitting on me... first time ever in THIS church. was actually talking to KY when he just stood beside... and i knew he was my friend's (this auntie i got to know who's a doctor) son so as a big sister i talked to him too. it all started out with "so are u in NUS too?".....

He started talking to me non-stop... and his gaze just made me all too suspicious... i started speaking to him like a sister and all of a sudden i realise it turned into some kinda casual flirting or sth. it wasn't obvious but i could see tat we had some kinda connection.. u know how sometimes when u meet a new person u can connect instantly and it seems like u've been friends for a long time. but i was disgusted to even think tat way coz he's SO young. 17. and he's some auntie's son. and she is so staring at us talking coz we were sitting far but directly across her! i felt like some kinda pedophile and so i did try walking away a few times... but didnt really work... he came back and spoke some more... he didnt know how old i was. when we were sitting down still waiting for sth to happen so we can help out, i felt awkward and did the "oh wat's the time?" thing. of coz i took out my hp and ahh! pic of dan and me on the wallpaper. haha didnt want him to see it but guess he did for tat spilt sec. it was only THEN did he suddenly pop tat question... "how old r u?" i was like... "give it a guess?"... "19?" GOSH he thought i was 19! flattered!!! hahaha i think after tat he kinda gave up! ;) altho he kept reassuring me tat i'm not tat old... i can still rem his face while he was saying tat and now tat i think abt it, it's pretty creepy. didnt know we have such pro-active guys in church. i thought guys in our church are all... eh... impossible. haha. well, i gotta say he's daring and pretty charming for his age. he's smart, like his mom... and will definitely get a great girl next time. someone his age. =) i was still happy nevertheless...to know tat i'm still young and eligible. haha!

Actually it wasnt only him. there was this other guy V from NTU... older..21... but still younger than me =| who sooooooooo obviously just wanted to know me. i think these guys gave it away too much from their facial expression. not trying to boast abt myself but tat's wat happened! out of the blue while we were busy packing stuff.. he intro himself to me and started asking me personal things like "are u still studying... where r u working at... which location..." and the ultimate was... "oh.. i think i know tat place... i'm actually going to a pub (some name..) near there later..." and there i was so afraid tat he'll pop the "care to join me" question. experienced me just "oh really? i think i might have heard of it but i dont know where tat is..." then smile and pretended to be busy. walked away. no way. i prefer the 17-yr old. hahaha..

so ya... my night was pretty happy, knowing tat i'm still marketable and havent grown so old tat i've blended to become one of the aunties. and i have also realised something abt myself. i deal better with old folks than kids. it's not a good sign....

Sleeping in. Sex. haha.

sleeping in felt SO good. it's certainly the best gift one could get after a tough week at work. oh and by late, i mean 930am. haha tat's a far cry from uni days where i would wake at 10 or even 11. ya by my standards tat's late. i'm a night person but yet also a morning person. maybe coz i never really get to enjoy my mornings tat much. i like to pack my lessons in the mornings so i can have freedom for the rest of the day. so i'm a bit of both. i sleep late and wake early. unhealthy i know =)

no activities this wkend except for to help out at a mooncake festival event in church. now tat i think abt it... why shld i be subjected to the "since ur bf isnt here you shld have time" statement!? i mean... he's not here... but i am.. and i have my own life right? i can plan or i may have plans for the day. but watever... i really had nothing on and i am such a bad liar sometimes. just sometimes =) anyways i'm doing this as a favour coz my usher team mate has been such a nice lady and she organized this event...

other than these... i'm addicted to Sex and the City! i am alr in season 4 albeit not watching every single episode of each season coz i couldnt find it online. honestly, it's a girl's show. some guy (u know who u are...) told me he liked it too... hmmm wat is it tat u like!? girl's perspective on sex? anyways... when i first started watching, i thought it was horrid. the sex and nudity is too explicit. after a while think i just get used to it. it's actually quite entertaining (not the sex of coz) and i realise i'm kind of a hybrid carrie and charlotte. definitely not samantha. hahaha... think i have the same perspective as charlotte when it comes to relationships and carrie reflects how i portray myself (of coz the more intangible stuff... i dont have a good body like hers). oh i love it! k actually i'm blogging coz i was waiting for it to load... gonna watch another episode now before i go for my swim - an-attempt-to-work-out swim. hahaha. have a great wkend! =)

Crushed.

I hate seeing you in so much pain. it hurts me more than you think. I just cant stand the way he's treating you, but yet i refrain from speaking in case it's you who ends up getting hurt again. You must be totally crushed inside but yet you always show us your strong side. You know what you should do, and I just pray that one day you will have the courage to put this to an end. I love you as a friend and hope you'll be happy again.

In love with my new Cereal

Brought my family for sunday brunch at crystal jade today. was great! parents were overjoyed tat finally they get to have their first meal on me hehe... had the usual dim sum with century egg porridge and the nice egg n prawn hor fun!! goshh yummmmmy! ;)

Walked cold storage after tat and yes, i bought a box of waitrose cereal with peanut and honey!! darling dont kill me yet.. coz it only costs 4 bucks! hahaa... was on quick sale coz it expires next mth... but i can definitely finish it coz it's superduperduper delicious!!

oh well tat's abt it for my sunday... came home after brunch and napped for 3+ hours! just decided to reward myself with more rest since this coming week is gonna be a pretty mad one... with big boss visiting from London... and i'm still thinking of how we shld account for the severe under achievement of our targets =| but something to look forward to will be No Signboard Seafood on thurs! and drinking sessions... haha cant wait to try new food and entertain like a business person! haha ;)

***
Went rollerblading @ east coast on sat afternoon with ade and mark coz all of us were desperate for some form of exercise. tho i dont really think it's enough coz we had sushi tei before tat!! ate sooooooooooo much hahaa... Happy BELATED Birthday Adelyn! =)

Saturday night was great too. had dinner with kel and spence at a thai restaurant in the "new" sunset way hangout... tomyam + phadthai + kuaytiao + springrolls + calamari + 2 coconuts filled us to the max! we prob put on a couple of pounds there and then. haha after our fantastic dinner, kel, cor, jotham n me came to my place for a night of games haha.. it was awesome!! could at least save some money this wkend coz we played board games! UNO Rummy, bridge and later dai di. had to change the game coz kel was losing in everything hahahaa! oh n kel was quite high tat night on peanuts and hoegaarden. funny!! but everything was great. thanks guys for spending time with me hehe... love ya all!

overall it was a pretty slow weekend... constantly waiting for darling to call me altho i try not to think abt it... missing u lots... call me soon!

My "New" Room

When i say "i'm determined to do it..." i am! i spent the whole sunday afternoon packing my room! 1pm-7pm! no joke! i only sat for a couple of mins.. the rest of the time i was standing... that explains my totally aching tights/butt now hehe. what a dusty workout! i wore a mask so that i wont get a runny nose. my nose is super sensitive to dust! considering the no. of hours i was in that dusty room, i must say the quality of the mask is good! ya my dad took it back from the factory. hahah... ;) i look super unglam...

For those who have seen my room before... this is the AFTER! my bro was totally shocked at its utter emptiness...:

Yes it's totally empty and thus NEAT haha... Darling! must be surprised ya? too bad u can't enjoy my nice cozy room now.. wish i had u here with me tho =) my room definitely misses u hehe =)

Anyways.. start of a new work week! i am surprisingly not dreading it... guess i've grown so used to it eh? =) have good week everyone! and study hard for those who are still in sch =)

love lots... zan

Sunday Sermon

Today's sermon was one of the best i've heard since we started on the book of Joshua, considering it's such a weird passage (Jos 20:1-9, "Cities of Refuge"). It appeared strange to me and i thought it's gonna be one of those boring passages (just like those "xxxx is the son of xxxx... kinda passages) but Wei-En brought a whole new perspective to it when he preached today.

The essence of the passage was the process of convicting Israelites who committed murder or manslaughter back then, and that God needed his land to be "clean" as he dwells among them. what a passage ya? BUT... It is more than just tat. How wei-en turned it around for our application was "Do we give people a fair trial before we pass judgement on them?" God gave his people a fair trial (as can be seen from the passage), even if they were murderers. Do we, as people of God, give our fellow bros & sisters (and pre-believers) a fair trial before we pass our judgements on them? I am sure we are guilty of this all the time. I shall be the first to admit. I am critical about ppl and i do jump to conclusions all the time. people whom i have bitched to for the past 2 mths abt my work situation should know i am sooooo guilty of it. oh well, today's sermon really served as a timely reminder. What more, i really liked the way wei-en drew a parallel of the conviction system with what God has done in the new testiment. What happens in the conviction process is that if one is guilty of either murder or manslaughter, he would be sent to a "city of refuge" where he will wait for his trial. Cities of refuge are where these gulity people can seek protection and they are also accessible to EVERYONE - Jews and non-Jews (this can be seen from the close proximity of all the cities). If they are convicted as murderers, then the Avenger of Blood (actual term in the Bible) will kill them, as only blood can atone for another life taken. only then will God's vengence be satisfied. However, if they were convicted with manslaughter, they are to stay at the city of refuge till the high priest in that city dies. Only then can they return to their homes. The reason is the same, only blood can atone for the life taken... and in this case, the guilt of the man who is convicted is transferred to the high priest when he dies. What's the parallel then? Jesus. It's amazing how "Jesus" is found even in the old testiment and how God's ways are so consistent throughout the ages. Jesus is our High Priest and when he died on the cross, he bears all our guilt and that's why we can be released of our guilt and not be threatened by the evil one anymore. Moreover, Jesus is also made available to all! How amazing is that? We're just a prayer away from Him. In the past, they had to walk 1 day to get to any city of refuge. Think about it... I think the Bible is amazing... God is so awesome! =)

Weekend Updates

Have been wanting to blog for the longest time but either had no time or was too tired. So this is gonna be a really long one =)

***iPod Nano Red***

I was sooooooooooo delighted to receive it!! the red nano is the prettiest thing i own now haha...

package from my darling =) | my new RED gadget!

altho i got it about mid-week, havent used it yet coz i'm such a protection freak haha! i'll get so upset if my gadgets get scratched etc So... decided to go get all the protection i need on sat after doing my hair. walked from lido to cine and all the way back to wheelock again! stupid me didnt really wanna go to the Apple shop first coz i thought it might be ex... oh well iShop is as ex! and they didnt really have nice stuff or rather what i wanted... what i really wanted was the leather nano pouch!! i think it looks absolutely gorgeous in a black/white leather pouch but they didnt have nice ones there.. and they were all like 39 bucks! didnt really wanna pay so much... anyways bought the screen and wheel protector film and the ipod sock in the end! the purple one... exactly same as spence's haha.. no choice coz tat was the nicest! oh and guess wat? i spent abt 35 bucks in all... sigh!! i shld have just gotten the leather pouch from the Apple store!! haha... nmind... i love the sock still :)

lovelove!

***HairY Good Time @ Next***

Decided to do my hair on Sat morning coz i really needed a haircut and i am bored of having my black hair. It turns out that this is one of my beeeeeeeeeeeeest visits to Next! The only thing that was not so great was i didnt have that long massage hairwash coz they said i was gonna do colour and they'll be washing it again later... Anyways, i never knew they were so professional in their services!

As usual, yazid came over first then i went for a hairwash. Spoked a little to the guy who washed my hair coz he did it for me before. In fact, i remembered watever he told me and he was kinda impressed... or maybe shocked at my fantastic memory. but watever... haha not like i'm interested in remembering things abt him. After tat, yazid introduced me to this guy, Marvyn! he's the chief colour technician in Next... gosh i think the whole concept is cool!! coz he's such a pro guy... and just imagine, all 3 of us were discussing abt wat colour would suit me and what colour would bring out the texture of my haircut best! how cool is tat! if u know me, i love such things. i would always pay for great service. anyways, they were really nice abt it... told them abt my past disaster with red during ac prom! and they actually said i was "colour shy". haha n they even comforted me... and told me not to worry coz they are not commercial salons... and that they are professional.. they used the term "feeling highlight" or "creative highlight" or sth.. basically they dont just blindly highlight the whole head, but they select strands that they feel will bring out the texture of the haircut. cool ya? haha! and marvyn actually told me he will start me on safer colour first to help me get over my disaster... altho he had 2 colurs in mind alr tat would be best for me... oh well, i lovvvvvvvvvvvvvvve it!! for the 3 hrs 15 mins i was there, i really felt like a queen! having ppl fuss over me... i guess tat's wat i'm paying for eh? :) but it wasnt only that! coz colouring is so time-consuming, i actually spoke to marvyn quite a bit.. told him stories after stories of my younger days.. joke ard... and even to serious stuff like him telling me tat he wants to settle down with his gf but yet it's gonna be hard coz he's going to shanghai with willy to set up the new branch at Hyatt hotel! and they're gonna be there 2-5 yrs! sad ya? i could only wish him the best... goshh i felt like i've made a new friend! i cant explain how i totally enjoyed myself there... and he even gave me his new shanghai name card and email! told me i could find him to do my hair if i ever go to shanghai haha wat a nice fella. oh and he actually introduced me to willy!! for the first time i spoke to willy and he's pretty nice la. not as cute as i imagined him to be (kel was right...) he has style but he doesnt have tat handsome a face. anyways yup. finally, yazid blew my hair into curls like again, except that now the curls are biGGER and funkier!! u know wat i looked like?? one of those harajuku girls!! I AM SO SERIOUS! hahaa... it's SO BIG! and my hair is highlighted so i really looked like a jap for a while!! and he put so much hairspray i almost drowned in it. ok i suggested taking a pic but i guess he wasnt too keen on the idea. hahaa.. tat's it.. i left after saying goodbye to marvyn. my first and last colour experience. how sad!! yup tat's for my trip to Next.

my not-so-big hair... still slightly curly at the bottom altho cant be seen here =)

***New Item on my Wishlist***

As i was waiting for my colour to sink in.... i found a new item on my wishlist:

The Patek Philippe Ladies Twenty-4! Saw it in Female mag... and was totally attracted to it! isnt it lovely? it has 36 diamonds and it comes with a set of earrings and a ring (unfortunately cant show pics coz it's a flash website) Check it out @ http://www.patek.com/patek-philippe.html. The watch totally goes with the ring! the Ring is the most gorgeous thing i've seen. sigh! but it shall remain on my wishlist only... for the time being ;)

Alright... i guess that's it for now.. it's really getting too long... i could go on and on... later when i have time =) drop me a msg!

Short Weekend

time flies! it's alr sunday afternoon! sigh... oh and sorry if my previous post made me sound like some spoilt brat... i just needed to bitch so badly and i guess nowadays i can only turn to my blog =)

saturday started really early for me. body clock woke me up at 730am on a sat... decided to do something useful coz i ate dinner so late the night earlier i was extremely bloated... i actually dragged myself to the gym! yes at 8am in the morning.. haha.. wanted to do some cardio so bad to get rid of that sucky feeling. guess wat? some stupid guy in his army singlet actually ran so long! i waited for the treadmill like 40 mins! anyways tat's not all... when i could finally start running, the guy went to the weights section (literally charging towards the place) and started doing weights.. the worse thing is, everytime he lifts, he goes "woooooooosh!" so he went "wooosh, wooosh, wooosh..." and he does it in a show-off manner! how lame... hahaa.. guys...

anyways that afternoon, went to meet the team for some prawn fishing action at Sin Ming Ave. yes we caught 40+ prawns altogether and ate them ALL after that. yummy!! i was pretty skeptical about the nature of our activity at first but i must say it was a worthwhile experience! u will get hooked after catching one or two prawns hahaa.. oh but it's totally cruel how their pincers were removed alive and how we BBQed some of them ALIVE! can u imagine them struggling as u put them over the fire.. goshh didnt know i have that compassionate side... but ya.. i felt sad for them =)

rushed to junction 8 to wait for my dad after that in all that filth, to realise only then that my dad's gonna be late. so i thought, why not do some shopping! hahaa.. yes i can shop anytime, anywhere, in any state. so i bought a pair of cheap shoes (20 bucks!!) and a RED top!! finally adding some variety to my wardrobe. love love.

night was the bomb! went to intercontinental hotel for dinner again to celebrate my grandpa's bday. drank the most expensive soup ever and it was fantastically delicioussssssssssssssss! we spent like 190 bucks on soup alone. hahha! but it's full of collagen and nourishing for the skin!!
not only that, we earned oursevles privilege cards at the hotel!! so now i have 20% off food in intercon hotel restaurants!! guys! let's head there one day?? =)

alrights... i'm exhausted... gonna nap on a sunday afternoon... raining now... till then, ZzzZZzz...

My Most Miserable Friday, Thus Far.

Today was just meant to be bad. It's probably destined from the start. Decided to try the peanut pancake from Mr Bean as my colleague told me it was good. It turns out that it's not the peanut pancake we expected it to be!! not the min jiang kuah kind but the jap pancake - round - kind! ugh! The worse thing is, he was shocked too! like?!?! "I thought u said it was good? u mean u didnt know??"..."I thought the soy milk was good... so the kueh should be good too..." GOSH! you know how relationships that start ok always tend to come to a point where you start getting irritated with his/her silly habits. Think i'm at this stage with him now. I'm getting impatient nowadays! perhaps it's coz of pms... but whatever... anyways tat was no. 1 BAD thing that happened today. Of coz this is in addition to the fact that before that, i stood beside the smellesttttttttt woman on earth on 171 as she bathed (wet hair) but still emitted a foul odour sporadically, and the dirty-man-who-prob-didnt-bathe who squeezed his way out of the seat without saying "excuse me" which almost caused me to hug the woman sitting beside me. I actually imagined the million of germs/bacteria that has been rubbed onto my pants and thinking of it just makes me sick. i need to bathe.

Day at work has been rough. workworkwork... non-stop... till 5.30... i'm still not done with 1 bloody client in 1 freaking day!! you have no idea how frustrating it gets!! just imagine having to do initial research on a school project... not knowing what you can get...but just try to get what u can get... and you are only researching on 1 thing - the company etc that you will be working on. ME? i have to do like 6 a day... which is my target... and sometimes in 1 freaking day you get stuck in all 6!! what do u do?! arghhh..... come 530 the whiny SIM girl wants to leave and i want to finish up at least 1 before i go... so i asked to take over her duty of sending our weekly targets to our BIG BOSSES. before i know it, it's 8pm and i'm still stuck with that stupid client! i just simply cant complete it coz there were some problems with it. GOODNESS. i really wanna scream! just before that, this guy from the team sitting opposite us was trying out his stupid ringtone. some hokkien song which prob every one knows the tune but hates it (at least for me). he played it like 10 times! not kidding! i was totally losing my mind... my whole team was! wat's up with these ppl? all the guys in that team are either faggots or ugly! all the women are either naggy or aunties! ARGH!!! it's so getting to me.. sometimes i wish they could just shut up.

Next was the thing that pushed me to my limits. I dont know how many times i have said this but I CANT STAND PUBLIC TRANSPORT - which includes taxis. (1) They are almost always not reliable. Late or does not even turn up. (2) Smelly and rude people onboard ALWAYS. (3)
Can forget about flagging a cab in CBD. (4) Can forget about calling a cab even coz you can never get thru ALL the hotlines. Unless you're lucky of coz.. but i guess we werent that lucky these days. sharon steph and i had to bus back yest coz all the lines were engaged. (5) Cab drivers just wanna earn that $4 booking fee and they DO NOT take any clients on the streets. A cabby confessed that to me proudly when i took a cab home on wed! Anyways, I left work at 8pm. Waited for the freaking bus for 30 mins!! what a totally waste of time! and what more, the journey will take me another 45mins or more. it's 8.30pm. i havent eaten anything since lunch. hungry. angry. frustrated. stressed. I just HATE public. I would do anything to drive to work. argh!

Finally reached home at 9.30pm. my mom didnt even heat up my food knowing i was coming back. i called her!! why? tv was more important. i tried to talk to them to get it off my chest! no, tv was more impt. i wanted to watch some different channel as i was eating my late dinner. No, they prefer another channel. what's up with them?! can't they just be nicer for once! sigh! they dont seem to care. they are like in their own world and only they matter. i dont mean to be whining like a teenage kid but sometimes it really hurts coz THE TV IS MORE IMPT. screw it.

Thank God i have a blog to rant on. if not i will surely die. somemore now dan cant even listen to me. sigh!!! I had the shittest friday of my work life!! =(

Darling pls call me.... =( have been waiting forever...

Yet Another Fantastic Weekend

not exactly in the mood to blog right now, but decided to do it anyway so darling from half ard the world can get updated.

i must say that this wkend was just as good as the last. friday night was simply lovely! went for modestoes dinner at vivo after some silly miscommunications caused by self-proclaimed king of fighters kelwin haha ended up not being able to attend melvin's art exhibition launch!! anyways dinner was deliciousssssssssssly good! kel, cor and I shared this double portion of LINGUINE (sounds familiar...haha) with crab, prawns, mussels, clams and squids. it's no joke. when the plate came, we were stunt and thought we were gonna die eating it! the plate was HUGEEEEEEE! like VERY! plus we ordered a woodfire pizza too... which was equally big! =) oh not to mention, we had our usual dose of free italian bread (which kel so happily finished)... calamari and $10 mushroom soup! i will post the pics up if tiff does upload them =)

oh that's not it. after dinner, we headed to Oosh @ dempsey for some drinks. oh my! the place was gorgeous and it was just such a memorable experience! will definitely visit it again some time soon =) thanks guys for "adopting" me always! love ya all lots =)

saturday was just slow for me. played tennis with ade and mark coz i decided i needed some form of exercise. didnt manage to go for dan's class coz my left knee cap is bruised from the accident. ugh!! it hurt like mad but thank god it has since became better...

caught hairspray which was surprisingly good after our tennis session.

stinky zan, clean ade and stinky mark

mark trying to act pro!

mark and i were so bored so decided to catch a show. i love it so much i'm gonna download the soundtrack. hehe suppose to have a poker session at steph's after tat but ended up playing bridge and daidi coz there were only 4 of us. quite sad. but then again, we had so much fun... seeing zu lose and bitching once again abt u-know-who. all was fun and good =) dan also smsed me while walking in woodbury! i cant wait to go up to NYC!! sighh he also told me tat the yogurt i'm always tempted to buy (like $4 in spore) was also USD$1!! goodness think i would really love NY haha.. cant wait for feb to come..

coffee with the sharon & nush @ cedele today was good too =) finally had the chance to sit down and have some girl talk.. hope we can do this more often. enjoying the power of freedom as working women. haha but as much as i'm enjoying my freedom as a semi-single girl, i miss him! everything abt him =)

alrights before i become all too emo and mushy.. gonna stop here... another work wk.. but i'm kinda looking forward to working hard... i love my job. for now =)

What a Horrible Night.

daddy and i got into an accident tonight. sigh! i dont feel like penning the details alr.. talked too much abt it.. we're fine but the car needs some work. sigh! i hate getting into accidents! and it's always not our fault! we did all we could to avoid but still cant... why cant ppl just drive carefully?! ugh!! 31-yr-old p-plate driver... sigh....

the mitsubishi in the middle of the road...

My Work Life...

Havent really blogged abt my worklife or introduce my work friends to anyone... took quite a lot of pics during team lunches/dinners coz my manager LOVES pictures! haha so do i actually... so let the pics speak for themselves...

my whole team...almost...

my refresh team - clarence, gin, hweeling (from left to right)

with Grace...best manager ever... :)

our fantastic smu intern! sheryl...

ok lazy to upload anymore.. next time =)

Home

Darling! a peek at your room...... haha! Don't be too sad tat ur trails are gone... =)



missing you. :)

Monday.

decided to pen down some thoughts before i head to bed. yey!!! i received dan's post card! haha thank u darling! so sweet of u! =) think the last time u wrote to me was... when we were 18? gosh tat's 5 years ago!! feel so old..

anyways, met up with my twin during lunch today... signed a million forms for insurance and yes! i might be getting a free PSP haha.. all thanks to my twin who put in the request for me! thanks twin! hopefully stupid uob approves it! :) and of coz dan ordered my pretty ipod nano alr.. with my name engraved at the back! gosh i cant wait to receive all my gadgets! i'm a techy girl hahaa.. =) now wat i need is a new canon ixus camera! perhaps nearer to the end of the yr.. i would need a better camera when i do get to toronto-newyork.

didnt get to talk to darling today. hopefully he settles down soon so we can talk. alrights, time for bed... nitez!

Memories of my Salvation.

Headed home after my shopping madness yesterday on public with my ipod and that's when i really started thinking abt what i'm gonna do with my life, my walk with God... sometimes when all is well - when i'm not tired and have lots of time to spare - i do enjoy taking the bus. sadly it's when i'm on the bus that i have the time to stop and think, reflect, ponder... Hillsongs will be on the top of the list whenever my ipod is plugged in as i'm travelling. whether u agree or not, it sets the mood for reflection and having some personal quiet time.

when it finally came to a really old song..."So You Would Come"... i suddenly felt like i was being transported back to those days in tcc's sanctuary.

Before the world began
You were on His mind
And every tear you cry
Is precious in His eyes
Because of His great love
He gave His only son
and everything was done
so you would come

Come to the Father
Though your gift is small
Broken hearts, broken lives
He will take them all
The power of the word
The power of His blood
And everything was done
So you would come

Nothing you can do
Could make Him love you more
And nothing that you've done
Could make Him close the door
Because of His great love
He gave His only son
And everything was done
So you would come

Come to the Father
Though your gift is small
Broken hearts, broken lives
He will take them all
The power of the word
The power of His blood
And everything was done
So you would come

By: Hillsongs

as i heard the lyrics, tears welled up in my eyes. it reminded me of the day rouen brought me to youth service. i was just 13. shy and quiet me didnt really dare to talk to anyone. following that, she invited me to attend a Bondage Breaker event. i remember how much i hesitated to put up my hand during alter call and how in the end i courageously decided to do it anyway. until this day, i can still testify that my decision was right and i really thank God for making me His child. God has been so patient and faithful to me this whole time and i've always been letting him down, leading my life the way i want behind the facade of not wanting history to repeat itself. it has been 10 yrs and i can still remember how as a young christian i enjoyed God's presence so much and i've always wanted to be in church coz i REALLY enjoy worship so much. indeed, moving to cbc was a great challenge. despite all the persuasion from my friends, i insisted on sticking to my decision coz i really didnt want my rel to sour. to put it in a blunt way, i left my comfort zone, gave up what i could have with God and chose to be with dan in cbc. to be honest, i do think that my rel with God has been short-changed. but being so used to it now, it doesnt really bother me anymore. it has taken a back seat somewhere in my heart. i do treasure what i have now and do not hope to deal with any major changes. my heart is so settled and i dont think there's anyone else for me... this makes it even harder to make decisions that will jeopardise things. i'm even willing to give up my dream to be with the one i love. like it or not, the culture in cbc is not healthy. but yet again, it's generational and i can hardly expect any changes. for example, most youths/kids have been going to church since they were babies. they know so much abt the Word but yet deep inside they do not even understand the meaning of the things we do. they are mostly emotionally detached. on the other hand, many youths in tcc are 1st generation christians. they accepted christ on their own and it really does make a difference. even the kids are different. for example, some of the youngest kids in tcc understands the meaning of tithing whereas adults like me dont even practise it. i really enjoy tcc's church culture. sometimes i whine abt it but most of the time i just give up trying. i ended up being comfortable with just going to church on sundays. i hate it. but it'll be like this. at least for a while - altho it has been almost 6 years. will things ever change?

sorry for such a messy post.. ya tat's kinda it... it's hard to put in words... till then.. another work week =|

Weekend Madness

For the first time since work started i slept at 4am! reached home abt 2.30ish last night after a fantastic time of fireworks-wine-margarita-liveband with some uni folks. it was all topped up with dan who came online!! excited me msned him & we chatted till 4am. but happy happy i was! haha... unfortunately, my good night sleep didnt last long as men kept shouting from my window at abt 1030am. my place is being repainted so always lots of commotion outside. ugh! there goes my sleep. but i'm glad i'm someone who doesnt need extra sleep as long as i've slept the same no. of hours - about 6hrs these days.

bar @ onerafflesLink i've always wanted to go | me & ht @ la baroque Chijmes | zw & cliff

ok this post is gonna be long and all over the place, so bear with me hehe =)

logging on to my laptop seems like the only thing i really think of when i return from work. or rather, ANYWHERE. since i was awaken earlier than i expected this morning, decided to log on again. and once again, dan was online! not only that, good news for me! i'm gonna get the red ipod nano all the way from US. haha! woohoo! darling cracked his powerbook n gonna get a new macbook.. so free ipod! this is gonna be MINE SOON....... haha...

Another great achievement today was SHOPPING! think i've reconnected with the shopper in me today haha! firstly, i braved the rain and public transport to get to town - with a bit of help from daddy tho... he drove me to newton... haha! come on it's still 10% bus!! anyways, as usual, first destination is always favourite Tangs. 3 pairs of earrings enough to last me for another couple of weeks before i get bored with them. simply lovely! next, off to moonstone and bought a pair of 3-quarts which is on 50%! ok it's still 40bucks, but it fits perfectly! ;)

the bottom pair has stars engraved on the rings.. not sure if u can see.. =)

The next must-go town place is ZARA! like of coz! haha... my first time shopping after getting first paycheck n spent 500 at one go in zara. i must say it was the ultimate therapeutic thing to do. plus of coz i needed work clothes too. have been sick of rotating my old clothes! sick of hearing "hey, u wore u nice top again..." which is more like "how come u're wearing the same top again..." so u get it. sigh! work clothes are bloody ex but i derived so much enjoyment trying them and actually paying for them. felt sooooooooo good making payment at the counter without having to worry that i wont have enough for the month. the power of the working class. these are 2 of my gorgeous buys... i really love them:

so hungry after 3 hrs of shopping but completely happy & contented. took public home - guilty from all the spending - and started reflecting on my own life. that i shall leave it to another post later on when i have time after watching bourne. kel and cor are the dearest to me these days. they're such darlings for asking me out all the time despite me reminding kel to spend more time with cor. i'm really grateful to u both for helping me rebuild my 1-yr-single-life. hehe off to prepare for movie night... later... :)

Surviving

Just got back from the gym not too long ago. was pretty motivated to work out at daniel's class today! however half way i really almost died. i feel sooooooooo unfit! =(

Anyways, dan shld be in the air right now... altho i seem to be surviving fine... i think i am adjusting to singlehood... i am afraid that this wont be the end... through the long bus and train rides in the mornings, my mind wandered and i suddenly felt this sense of loss. i wont be able to feel him anymore! everything's just so surreal... it doesnt seem that he's gonna be gone for a long time.. tat's the scary part.. tat means the worse part of missing him is not here yet sigh! but i know i will make it. yes i will.

ok that's it for now... will post a better one in the weekend.. gonna sleep alr... nitez......

Lost for Words

i'm soooooooooooo happy! chatted with dan over skype for almost an hr just now! it was a weird chat tho.. i spoke but he typed..coz he complained that there was some kinda echo over his end when he speaks. anyways it was good. =) i miss him! and now i really wanna go japan! haha.. idea......... =) go look at his facebook pics! not alot but japan's really lovely hehe...

kaez gonna rest for the night... *yawnz*

His First Call

gosh i almost missed my darling's call!! i know it's silly but i turned on my skype even tho i know he doesnt have his laptop with him... i dozed off coz i was soooooooooo tired n still had to entertain my china relatives as they stopover in spore... suddenly i was in a half daze and i heard my laptop ringing!! goshhh can u just imagine the excitement?! i was so happy but yet sad at the same time. i was sooooooo gonna cry but i held back. esp after hearing his voice which is not so happy... kinda cracked up i thought he cried secretly. altho i think that's a possibility but i decided to push tat thought aside. i know i wont be able to control my own emotions if i delve on it.

wells it's good hearing him. knowing he's safe. altho he's feeling lonely and all now, i know he'll be fine given time. God, I pray for your protection over him and not let him come to any harm. I pray that you'll comfort him when he's feeling lonely. and speak to him in your own time.

dearie i really miss u lots and still can cry buckets when i think abt it... but in time to come i'll come to get used to it. love you always... =)

nitez all... yawnz...

Bye Love =(

i hate bidding farewell at the airport. all the tears and agony of seeing ur love ones leave... it's just so torturing. it's 6.15am and i just got home from sending dan off. i tried my best to control and cry before tat but as we strolled towards the gate, it still happened. i cant help it! it felt like there were still so many things i wanted to say and it's just impossible to say it there and then. i'm so worried abt him getting lost given his poor sense of direction. worried that he might not make the best choices as we have always been making decisions tog since we got tog. sigh! yes, it's time to let go. it's time that you travel ur journey n i'll fully concentrate on mine. i just pray that our long-dist relationship will work and i promise u to try to work towards it. Funny enough, it was the girl who we always joked abt who came and hugged me to comfort me. as off as she may be, i think she's a nice and harmless girl. i really appreciated her gesture regardless of whether she meant it or not =)

it was a tiring day indeed. i'll miss u dearly love! and pls email me at work or drop me a comment here whenever u can... hugz n kisses... zan...

Inspiration

finally thought of what i can give dan for his farewell!! haha... gladgladglad... i love how my days go by lately... it's so slow tat i actually have time to think freely. have been sitting in my room for an hr or so listening to class 95's Y2K wkend. it's surprisingly good! i have never appreciated radio that much except for when i'm driving.. until now when my tv died on me. but then again, too much of such tunes will usually lead me to tat fine line between nostalgia and depression. anyways, i'm lovin it now and tat's wat tat matters. =)

oh abt tat gift... i was thinking of a nice frame with a pic of us! what do u think? tat way i can always be with him on his table somewhere in his new room half across the world... haha! also, should i decorate it myself or buy a nice one off the shelf?? doing one on my own will be time consuming but it's not like i have no time after work... just need to get the damn plain frame from ikea which is totally totally inconvenient! mmmm... altho i have made millions of such sweet thingys for him in the past, i think this is still a better gift? yup. i think it is. tell me i'm wrong? haha i'm totally gay now! nono.. i'm ELATED! hehe... it's always hard to think of a gift for dan coz i've bought him enough stuff to cover him twice from head to toe! alrights.. off to my next mission... finding that one picture... mmm..... ;) work's tmr... excited once again... heez

Super Under the Weather

thought i was gonna die like seriously last night. my gastric pain was just killing me and once again i have to visit the doctor twice! wat's up with silver cross? it's just tat particular doc. he totally sucks. anyways glad to be employed. tat way docs are always free. hehe. puked again altho i didnt even eat anything for like close to 24 hrs now. grossest ever! sigh! i slept the whole day today literally coz i didnt manage to sleep last night. it feels horrid. no one shld ever go thru this!

i'm more worried abt work actually. i know this sounds stupid but wat if i dont pass my probation? sigh! it's training from london tmr and if i cant be there, i'm gonna lag behind real bad! stress! sighhhhhhh thanks to my greediness i'm in this state. it wont happen again. so WONT. no more binging for me at work.

finally, i really pray that my twin will cheer up more. it hurts everytime i read her blog coz she deserves much more than this. love u twin. take care!

Bad Day

shopped so desperately for work clothes. bought 4 tops. but dan's not pleased tat we're not spending quality time given tat our days tog are numbered. and when i came home, realised 1 of the top size doesnt fit! u know how when u try the display it's different from the new piece!? ugh! AND the other top looks weird from when i tried it on earlier!! arghhhhhhhhh they better allow me to change it! sobz. next, a bigger AND... tmr's MONDAY! =( k it's time to zZZzzz.... sigh.

Weekend Cheer

what a lazy weekend! finally able to sleep in later on sat but napped again in the afternoon. same goes for sunday. yawnz. but it definitely does feel fantastic!! i miss those days where sleeping till 10 is the norm.

found out something nice today. on sunday afternoons, 98.7 has this really nice programme called Strip. they play all acoustic versions of songs... i like! class 95 has nice hits too... but sitting in my room and listening to those songs just makes me feel emo again. firstly, i am gonna lose my room soon if my parents decide to downgrade. i love my room. the most cozy room i've ever had! secondly, darling is leaving soon. in abt 3 weeks. i promise to not make him angry from now till then so our time together will be more fruitful hehe. i'll miss him dearly! third and lastly, i feel old! i feel like my mind is aging. gosh i cant believe i am actually very much looking forward to saying "Yes, I do." just months ago i was all ready to make my mark in the corporate world, climbing the corporate ladder and wanting to achieve my career aspirations at all cost even if i have to slave. now i am just fine with where i am and wants more fulfillment in my personal life. help! i am sooooooooo getting old =| perhaps the maslow's hierarchy of needs is in action here. sigh!

Bon Jovi's playing now.... gosh one of my favourites... it's all about loving you... haiz k i better stop this now before i fall into one of my mini depressions. haha. alrights gonna do up my personal accounts spreadsheet like i promised myself. i must learn to save already. later... =)

TGIF!

still remember how silly i sounded this morning when i asked irza & sharon what TGIF was. ended up a bimbo once again! haha but now i can truly say TGIF!! a week of work totally tired me so bad. i could really do with some sleeping in!!

anyways, it's our 6th anniversary today! as long as it may sound, i'm glad it's here coz now i realise i really wanna be in his life forever. i always felt apprehensive abt us being together for so long... and how stagnant we have become... and have always thought that perhaps time apart will help us decide if we really want to stay together forever and that a positive outcome will only make us more certain of our decision. but NO. as the day of his departure approaches, i cant help but feel the loneliness creeping in. not being able to talk to him when i want, see him when i want. in fact buckets of tears flowed everytime i think abt it. i dont want to but i cant help it! i already miss him. when i started working.. it's like reality hits me. i'm finally an adult.. i have to think abt my future... and that includes my life happiness.. and somehow now there is no more doubt in my heart. i want him to be in my life till death do us part. i know it puts pressure on him but i cant help but tell him that. i need reassurance that he still does want us to work out and that he will put in effort in making it work too. i want to be assured that he isnt going there with the mentality of still being unsure of whether i'm the one. he says he isnt unsure abt me, juz unsure abt marriage. i can understand that. but YES, now i'm sure.

we celebrated at Lawry's! it's probably the best dinner we've had tog! the experience was juz wonderful... so cut off from the rest of the world. tat's pretty much it tho... just enjoying each other's company sipping wine and then tea. feeling fascinated tog when the manager cooked my steak right in front of us. the last part where heated brandy was poured over the steak, it's like a flaming fountain. beautiful! eh we watched it like 3-4 times actually... tat's how long we stayed... watching when other table's food was cooked too haha! it was awesome anyways. service was truly FANTASTIC. the best i've ever had in S'pore. and of coz the food is solid!! it's definitely worth the price =) but ultimately... it was our love that made it such a wonderful night. thank you dearie. i love you! always... ;)

tired.

gosh work is so draining. every evening all i can think of is sleep. sleep. zzZZzzz... i cant wait to be able to drive to work! i pray that God will grant me a parking lot soon... haha but first i must get my lazy butt to find one! goshh i feel so tired after work i dont think i have the energy. during lunch it's just lunch. mornings are too early. i'm always on the dot. 9am. haha! help!

anyways did more real work today and was pretty glad i feel challenged haha.. but i like it.. challenges are good =) still excited abt work... hope this stays for a long time hehe

nitez.......

First Day of Work

To a certain someone, this update is for u! haha... anyways, as promised, you can view my grad pics at the 2 following links:

http://nus.facebook.com/album.php?aid=13618&l=78145&id=521011280

http://nus.facebook.com/album.php?aid=13621&l=2547e&id=521011280

First day of work was ok i suppose. Induction was boring like mad. said hi to a couple of ppl.. this girl who'll be working in Finance and another in Investment Solutions. The latter is real stuff. She looks fighting tough and all ready to conquer the world. haha... i guess now i know why i didnt get called up for that position =)

Besides that, met my team. nice people as always. God is good, never fails to give me the best colleagues. this guy who is new as well is just like zu! not only does he looks like zu, his mannerisms are like his too! plus he's not as cranky and i'm really thankful for that. haha. anyways, really nothing much to update coz nothing much happened. am still looking forward to doing some real work soon and going for trainings =) till then...

my buys

This is what i've spent on so far this month:

Gucci sunglasses
Coloured contacts
Zara!
Massimo Dutti!!
Nike sports bra

Wish List:

More work clothes
Graduation pressie - watch?
earrings
dress for grad dinner
Webcam
Darling's promise - Coach bag
Braces


Now that i'm finally near securing a job, I'd rather have a longer holiday. Please let my boss be nice! God pls help me so that I can attend all the events ahead. =|

random

alright, looks like i won't be updating my previous post on krabi. haha. too lazy! but most pics can be viewed on my facebook:

Part 1: http://nus.facebook.com/album.php?aid=7506&l=6e64c&id=521011280
Part 2: http://nus.facebook.com/album.php?aid=7581&l=cfe18&id=521011280
Part 3: http://nus.facebook.com/album.php?aid=7635&l=feeea&id=521011280
Part 4: http://nus.facebook.com/album.php?aid=7645&l=580af&id=521011280

life has been busy for me, such tha project-clean-up-room has been postponed to forever. haha! endless interviews (which is good actually). fussing with dan's exchange stuff. longing to accompany him for his solo trip, but yet wanting to secure a job i like. thinking abt how i'll miss him like crazy when he's gone. I WILL. sigh!

I guess there'll come a time where we must embark on our own life journey. just on our own. we have two different paths now. i just pray hard that the day where our paths will meet again will come in no time. I love you dearie. =)

My little Grad Trip - Krabi

Krabi was fantastic! haha thankfully there were 2 days of really strong sun! altho i could do with more hehe... oh and another thing... i wanna thank God that we managed to come back alive!! it is and will be the last most dangerous adventure in my life haha!

@ stupid budget airport. it sucks!!

Day 1: Arrival

We arrived at about 9+ 10pm... so there was really not much we could do! Had dinner
and dropped by the poolside bar for a drink and then off to an early night.

The room isnt very fantastic. but it's big!

us at the poolside bar... talking to the bartender who is prob the
only person in the whole resort who understands eng a bit more

Day 2: AoNang Explore Mission

Good day! it's a sunny morning. breakfast at 9am and off to explore the aonang beach area where we lived at. or so we thought. we walked out from our resort area and happily turned RIGHT as instructed by dan ever so confidently. 5 mins later... "wow aonang beach sucks...it's pretty dirty...", "it's pretty quiet hah?" 15 mins later... "are u sure we're on the right way?" 45 mins later... "what's this? ohh the sand bar! rem we saw it on the web??" haha! after 45mins of 2.2km walk... we realised maybe we went the wrong way. but dan was still convinced tat the driver told him specifically to turn right upon leaving our resort.

This was where we headed... the final destination is the 3rd pic. like ?!?!

"let's take a tuktuk back"..."Aonang beach pls...eh 40 baht is fine..." About 5 mins of tuktuk ride... we past our resort...walaaaaaaaaa! just 5 steps to the left and we hit the aonang beach area. ?!?!?! thanks to my dan i ended up a little burnt after our 2.2km walk in the hot sun. hahaa... but it was a pleasant walk nonetheless with my sweet darling =)

supermarket named after dan haha...

my hero haha...

here we are. at the main aonang area =) and there... suicide mission: we rented a bike!! yes our lives depended on it. so many sense of that word it freaks me out everytime i'm reminded of it.

ok shall stop here first... will update further when i find the time to... =)